You are missing this Governor Tricorn Pirate Hat.
Sure it looks like a Kia, but it’s really the Queen Anne’s Revenge. You even figured out how to hoist your pirate flag, a pole stuck through the sun roof that also doubles as the crows nest. Besides then you would never get to sail (drive) the seven seas (highways in town) collecting your booty (the shopping)! Heck, you even have a flint lock (plastic of course), and a sword (also plastic) to do battle against anyone you might come across.Governor Tricorn Adult Pirate Costume Hat Now you could go claim it from some poor unsuspecting oaf, or you can just click “Add to Cart” here, and not have to face charges of (plastic) armed robbery.